I Should have called and told you.....

I am swooning.... Awwww... ok but, seriously. I have meet me a man and things are going well. I have been afraid to say anything for the many questions there will be. But I really like Country man and things are very different with him then with any other guy. I think that is why I decided to write this out I need to work things out in my head.

So I guess the starter is where did I meet him? Well I went to meet Country Man's friend. I didn't know he was bringing Country Man I am so glad he did tho. Me and the friend did not hit it off but, I did with Country Man. Needless to say said friend was not happy and didn't want us talking and I said if CM agrees then fine. CM did not agree and called me the next day there have been MANY long nights on the phone for the last 2 weeks. We finally got to see each other again on Friday night and went out Saturday for my birthday.

We went to dinner at LOGAN'S of course then went bowing with Steph,Kenny, Kevin, Melissa, and Scott. We all had so much fun one of my best birthday's I had my girls with me and Country Man. It was wonderful!!! SWOON

So now to the part that I need to work out in my head. I think I have it figured out but, still thinking on it. So Country Man and I are taking things so not RUSHING. I know what a switch for me but, really I'm not I am going one day at a time with this. Things are going great Country Man has spoke of things like what do you want for Christmas and we have talked of doing a few things in the next couple of months.

So why does this feel so different then with any guy I have ever been with? That is the part I can't get. He's not like other guys I have dated before either he is sweet and tender and says the nicest things. To which I joke and say ' keep earning those brownie points' which he is. I have never had some one call me Miss America, perfect, gorgeous, and just beautiful. This is not normal for me I love it but, so not used to it. He cares about how I feel about different things he is so gentle, respectful, honest, gentleman, and Country. I shocked him one day he asked me if I knew who Bill Dance was? I said yeah I know who he is My dad watches his fishing show. Not even kidding this is what he says "Me and your dad will get along great we can watch hunting and fishing all day." Great me and mom will shop!!! I know I not looking for a man for my dad but, I enjoy those things I loved it when dad came home with whatever he went hunting for. Those are great memories I have with my dad.

Fuzzy says that I think it feels different because I'm not rushing things that I am going one day at a time and seeing what happens. I am excited and can't wait to see where things go but, I'm not pushing things to get there. So I guess what I am saying is I am happy so happy I can't even explain fully what I am feeling cause I don't know. What I do know is I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings.

I LOVE Songs

You ever have a song that just I don't know how to say it sticks with you and it won't go away? Sure you have everyone has.

After reading someone else's blog I now have a song stuck in my head. Like said person I love this song it says so much about having the Faith that we some times forget we have. The things God has done in our lives or people that we know.

I love music and think that songs speak a message to us in their own way. There is another song that we sang at Falls Church Called Second Chance by Hillsong I love this song.

You called my name Reached out Your hand

Restored my life And I was redeemed

The moment You entered my life

Amazing grace Christ gave that day My life was changed

When from my shoulders Fell the weight of my sin

So it’s with everything I am I reach out for Your hand

The hope for change The second chance I’ve gained

On You I throw my life Casting all my fears aside How could greater love than this

Ever possibly exist

Consume my thoughts As I rest in You

I’m now in love With a Saviour Bearing the marks of His love

So I’ll wait upon You now With my hands released to You

Where a little faith’s enough To see mountains lift and move

And I’ll wait upon You now Dedicated to Your will

To this love that will remain A love that never fails


It is such a true song His love never fails, No one loves us like God loves us and he can move mountains. When everything feels like you are in the pit and never going to get out he is there with his hand stretched out to us. To pull us out of the pit believe me cause I have been in that pit several times.

No mater what we do he still loves us and is there for us. I know I can always turn to God for help whenever I need it and he will be there I take comfort in that.

I want to share a few songs that I have been listening to I will give you titles you can look them up I have several. Go check them out you might like them.

What Faith Can Do by Kutless
All Along By Remedy Drive
Lord move, or move me By FFH
Every move I make by Hillsong kids
The words i would say by Sidewalk prophets
More Beautiful You by Jonny Diaz
Love is here By Tenth Avenue North
By Your side By Tenth Avenue North
Can't get away by Rush Of Fools
There's only Grace Matthew West

So go check them out they might speak to you also.

Have a great day love Toni :)

Home Is Where The Heart Is.............

I love being Home


I just have to blog about this because I have been thinking about it the last couple of days and it the only way I will get it out of my head.

So you know how when you go away on vacation or visit someone then when you come home you are so relieved and happy. That is how I have felt for the last few weeks being back in Indiana. It’s so like coming home from a long vacation I know that sounds weird to anyone else. This is home for me; my heart has been here since I left 2 years ago. I was happy in Sioux Falls with my family I am always happy to be with them and I miss them lots. But I love being back in Indiana. Melissa used to tell me ‘you just don’t seem happy there you need to come home where you were happy’. I thought she was just trying to get me back here which she was but, I wasn’t as happy as I am here. Looking back on all I have done the last 2 years I wasn’t happy I see that now I didn’t then.


I am so excited to start this new chapter in my life it’s not a new beginning it is almost picking up where I left off. Working at TG, seeing (and living with) Melissa, all my friends, and seeing JJ. You don’t realize how much you miss things till they aren’t there or they come back. I knew I missed everyone but, I didn’t realize I missed them this much. It is the little things that I missed the most driving down a country road, all the fall trees, creek walking, walks in the woods, 4 wheeling, and bond fires in the woods. Things we used to do and can do again I love that so much. I love when Melissa looks at me and says remember when we used to do this lets go do this. We did a lot of crazy things (sorry dad) but, we where always careful and we had fun. I guess I missed being a country girl the most, getting dirty and having fun while doing it.

So the question is to me would you change the last 2 years? No I got to experience a lot of things that I never probably would have if I hadn’t moved. I meet some great people that I will never forget and will always love. I got to spend time with my family I love being with my niece and nephews I miss them so much.

The other question I get why did you move back? I missed this place everyone who lives here wants to get out. I have been out I wouldn’t trade southern Indiana for any where in the world I love it here. Maybe it is the people I have around me that make it extra special but, I real do love this area.

I know I jump around in what I am saying sometimes it is because there is so much going on in my head. I get off on one thing then go back to something else I guess I am a little scatter brain.

Until next time have a great day and I will post new pictures soon.

Yeah I know what you are thinking......

I know where have you been? What are you doing? What is going on? So here is the deal remember how in my last post I was going to Indiana for 3 weeks on vacation.

Well.....I am staying in Indiana!!!!! I know what heck. Total shocker to me also I wasn't planning on staying no one was. I went by my old job on Thursday the 22 to see my friend we talked and thought we would play a joke on my old boss. The job I had when I was here opened up bout a month ago I knew it was open Fuzzy had already tried to get me to take it. So Connie and i thought it would be funny to fill out the bid form for the job and put it on his desk so we did. I wasn't expecting him to really do anything about it. Connie text me and said he was looking into bringing me back then the HR lady calls me says they want me to go to Kelly and fill out the app. Because they aren't hiring right now they have to go through Kelly. I tell her I need to think about it and talk it over with some people and I would get back to her(my parents and Melissa). So I talk to Melissa she is cool with it then I make the phone call to dad DOOM DOOM DOOM. He was more worried about the plane ticket then anything I couldn't believe it. He isn't excited because it is so far away from them but, he knows that there aren't jobs there for me.

So I called my old boss back told him i could start on Nov 2 (I am on vacation remember) because I am going to Indy the last week on October. I go down to Kelly Friday morning fill everything out the lady says they want you to start on the 26. I said no I told them I can't I am going to Indy for the week. Then I said ok I will start on the 26th IF I can have Friday off that is the only way they said ok. So I started back at my old job yesterday. Can you believe that WOW I am still in shock.

Last night went really well there are things that will come back over time I know mostly it is learning the numbers of things again. Otherwise all is well I am happy Melissa is happy we got my room all set up well cleaned up more she already had it set up. I will be so happy after this weekend I wont have to live out of a suitcase anymore. After I get a couple pay checks going to send dad money to send me more clothes and shoes. It really sucks when you know you have something some where and you can't get it so annoying I hate that.

So that is what is new and exciting in my life i tell you, you never know what will happen or where I might be.


On a totally different matter I just want to say when you were a kid and your parents made you clean the house and you said they only had you to clean their house ( that is what I said). We used to tease my dad and say your dirty is everyone else's clean. Then you grow up and have a place of your own and you keep it clean you fell proud of that and don't realize that is what they were going for teaching you to do those things. I am very thankful for all the things my parents taught me as a child I didn't know it then but I do now that they were all very important things for me to learn.

Thanks Mom and Dad for being great christian role modles, taking us to church every week, and teaching us things about life that we didn't understand at the time. I know I have made my own mistakes but, you have always been right there praying for me and the Lord's will in my life. Thank you for being the best parents I love you guys.

So here is what is up...

So I back here in Souix Falls, SD been here since July. Things are going ok I started back at School Bus filling in as a aid. It is going ok hey it is a paycheck if nothing else. I am really excitied that I get to take a 3 week vaction in 16 days. Two of my girls are getting married yeah for them. So Fuzzy and John are getting married on Oct. 12 and Jada and Brian are on Oct. 31. I am so happy for my girls. Really excited that I get to see some people like my other girl Melissa, Stephanie, Kevin and so many others.

Melissa is really excited also she can't wait for me to get there. I miss you girl

This is my Jada she is getting married on Oct 31. I can't believe my Jada is getting married. We have know and been friends since we were 8 years old that is way to long. I can't even believe that it has been that long.

This is Melissa and John they are getting married on October 12. I am so happy for them I have watched this relationship blossom since day one. I saw it before they did I love doing that. I thought John was never going to ask her (neither did Melissa). I am so happy for you guys Love you lots.

Things are changing!!!!

So a lot of things have happened in my life the last couple of week. I'm not going to tell all but, lets just say I have hit an all time low now. I did it I have no one to blame but, me it is ok I know I will come out of this.

So on Sunday my sister is taking me back to Sioux Falls. Yes I know what a surprise but, this will be good it is better then staying in Texas. I wont be a burden to my sister and her family. So it is back to living with the folks. Not that excited about that but, yet I am. Have to start a job search which I hate. But I have to find a job I have to go to Indiana in October for 2 weddings need to make some money.

Yes 2 of my favorite people are getting married. One is my best friend since the 3rd grade. My Jada is getting married on the 31st yes Halloween. I know surprise right. The other is Melissa(aka Fuzzy) I worked with her in Indiana she is marry a guy we both worked with. He is a great guy I am so happy for them.

I'm not sure if I want to put this out there on here but, I don't think anyone reads this anyway. Let me start at the beginning since I moved to SF EVERYONE in Indiana has wanted me to come back and live there. I have to say that it has crossed my mind a couple of times to move back. So the other day I was presented with a really great offer to move there. I'm not going to go into detail just yet I am still thinking and praying about where God wants me to be. There are lots of job opportunities there for me more then in SF. I really think I want to do this my only concern is telling my folks I don't think they will like the idea of this happening. I think they will say it is crazy that it wont work and I am going to fall on my face. To that I say I did good in Indiana had jobs that were good and I made sure my bills were paid. I never had problems like this there. I also have a great support system there I have lots of 'Family' there they all love me and want to help me out.

So this is what is going on in my life so exciting huh. Please pray for me in this time that I am going through.

Crazy working

Remind me why I wanted a job so bad??? I ask myself this a couple times last week at work.  It gets really boring standing in one spot and can't talk to the person next to you. 1 They can't hear you. 2 They don't understand you.  So now I pretty much work on this line on a mezz that is re bar has mats on it but doesn't help. I have shoes that are over a year old and the heels are wore out. So I try and walk back and forth so that my feet wont hurt and try to add some padding.  So Work is great really it is a job and I can get lots of overtime I will have 60 hours in this week. That will be a nice check I can save and pay bills. That is about all I don't know much of anything else. 

I GOT A JOB!!!!!! YEAH!!!!!

I got a job!!! So here is the story of me getting the job I saw an add on Craigslist that they were hiring 300 people for a factory job. So I went down there it was a temp place and took an hour to fill out the application but, when I was done I had a job. The man gave me this map and said be here tomorrow 8:30 am. So I went toured the plant then went to orintaion where I filled out the app. They asked right after we got there anyone want to go to work tonight? I said sure so I got out of there at 12:30 headed home took an hour nap then headed to the new job. I have to say I don't think I have ever worked that hard even when I worked at Beach. Here is what I did all night there is this machine that takes the sheet metal and cuts it and puts holes in the metal strips. Which fall into slots then you put two rods into each stack of strips you pull those out line them up on a table 4 sets of them. Then you put the coil in the holes and push it all the way in till it comes out the end. Then lift it off the table put it on the stack with the others and start over again.So there is a lot of lifting and stretching and using muscles I haven't used in a long time. The good thing is it is a work out and I need that. I don't have to go to the gym to workout yeah don't have to pay for a membership. So needless to say I didn't do anything yesterday but, lay around cause I hurt so bad. Today we picked up the house did laundry and cleaned my room up.

I was going to post these pics before but, was waiting for Mindy to post them first. So here are the pictures from the Rodeo.

Have a great day. Love always  Toni

Job Hunting

So I thought I had a job. Which I did have it but, it was not the right job for me. I went on this awesome interview Tuesday night for a nanny job. I clicked with them I think I hope they think I clicked with them too. This is an awesome job it is salary and I would get to travel with the family. I am praying this is where God would have me be. If you all could please keep me in your prayers for the job God wants for me.

I love this skit

While I'm Waiting

I have fallen in love with this song if you have seen Fireproof you have heard this song. This song has hit me as a single very hard I need to Serve, Worship, Obey, and Pray while I am waiting on God to provide the right man. Just listen to the words if they will touch you in some way.

What I learned in Church on Sunday.

So I learned a few things in church on Sunday that i never knew. Not to say that I wasn't taught properly it was just never explained. Now I have to explain it to you so we are studying Genesis in church going through the book. This week we were on God made a covenant with Abram. I'm going to post the Scripture then show you what i learn cause I want to get it right and it make since.

8 But Abram said, "O Sovereign LORD, how can I know that I will gain possession of it?"

9 So the LORD said to him, "Bring me a heifer, a goat and a ram, each three years old, along with a dove and a young pigeon."

10 Abram brought all these to him, cut them in two and arranged the halves opposite each other; the birds, however, he did not cut in half. 11 Then birds of prey came down on the carcasses, but Abram drove them away.

12 As the sun was setting, Abram fell into a deep sleep, and a thick and dreadful darkness came over him. 13 Then the LORD said to him, "Know for certain that your descendants will be strangers in a country not their own, and they will be enslaved and mistreated four hundred years. 14 But I will punish the nation they serve as slaves, and afterward they will come out with great possessions. 15 You, however, will go to your fathers in peace and be buried at a good old age. 16 In the fourth generation your descendants will come back here, for the sin of the Amorites has not yet reached its full measure."

17 When the sun had set and darkness had fallen, a smoking firepot with a blazing torch appeared and passed between the pieces. 18 On that day the LORD made a covenant with Abram and said, "To your descendants I give this land, from the river [d] of Egypt to the great river, the Euphrates- 19 the land of the Kenites, Kenizzites, Kadmonites, 20 Hittites, Perizzites, Rephaites, 21 Amorites, Canaanites, Girgashites and Jebusites."

So you see there in verse 10 where he cut them and put the halves on opposite sides this would make all the blood come together. When there was a covenant made the two would walk through the blood to confirm the covenant. There in 17 when it says a smoking firepot with a blazing torch appeared and passed between the pieces that was God completing the covenant for Abram since he had fallen asleep. The really cool thing with God doing that is back then if one party didn't complete there end of the covenant they were killed. I never knew all these things so it was very interesting to me.

The other thing I learned was how Jewish weddings are done and the Lord's supper. So take the part of the blood from above and apply that to the Lord's supper stay with me.

17On the first day of the Feast of Unleavened Bread, the disciples came to Jesus and asked, "Where do you want us to make preparations for you to eat the Passover?"
18He replied, "Go into the city to a certain man and tell him, 'The Teacher says: My appointed time is near. I am going to celebrate the Passover with my disciples at your house.' " 19So the disciples did as Jesus had directed them and prepared the Passover.

So they were on a mount and Christ sent them to a city where they had to walk through the valley were others were sacrificing for the passover. So they left the mount and walked through the valley. When we take the Lord's supper and it says this is the blood of the new testament which was shed for many. I got that part but, listen to this ok in the Jewish faith when a man wants to be with a girl he goes to her farther they have a glass a wine. The man leaves builds a house for her comes back for her. They walk down the aisle the aisle is the blood flow you have the bride side the groom side think about that and what happened with Abram. So then they have another glass of wine when they are married see the connection? Christ had a glass of wine with the disciples at the last supper that being the engagement wine. During the last supper Christ says he will not drink of that fruit of the vine till he drinks it anew with us in heave at THE MARRIAGE SUPPER in heaven. HELLO never got that before. Then when they were finished they went out into the mount of olives where they had come from so they walked back through the blood from all the sacrificed animals. I think I got all that right I thought it was so cool light bulbs were going off in my head like why did I never put this all together.

I just wanted to share this with all I enjoyed it very much and if you would like to hear the message you can go to this link http://www.kingsland.org/Resources/sermonseries.htm and click on the music note next to Abrahamic Covenant.

I hope you enjoy love always Toni.

It has been awhile.

Man there has been so much more happen since the last post. I really need to do this more often I just get busy and don't think about it. Plus I made this blog as a place for me just to vent and say what ever I want. Anyway when I last left you i was living in South Dakota. Not so anymore I am now a Texan. Of course Texan's don't think that bout I am calling myself that. I love the south it is the best place to live the people are just so much nicer here than in the north. Now don't get me wrong there are nice people in the North but, everyone is nice here.

So I guess you want to know how this all came about and the whole what you doing now. The middle of january my brother-in-law was laid of. Two weeks later he came across an add for a job he called the number spoke to a guy sent his resume. The next day Roger spoke to the guy again they wanted to see Roger and wanted to know how soon he could get to Houston, Tx. My sister and Roger left that weekend leaving the Children in my hands with the help of others. Let me tell you that was a crazy 4 days children were sick and unhappy. They of course liked Roger, he liked the company they put him up for a month and my sister came home to pack up the house.

Then came the 'You know you could come with. I'll need some help.' Which didn't hurt me any I was more than willing to move leave that cold weather. I don't and wont miss that at all. I decided to come with I packed up my stuff also and came to Texas too. It has been great I'm still looking for a job but, I know God will provide one.

There has been another good come out of it I quit smoking I haven't had one in 7 days. I am so proud of myself I am trying really hard this time and I think this is the longest I have went. So go me!!!!!!!

I think that is about all I will post more in a little while need to go to bed. Love always Toni

Man it has been CRAZY

I know I haven't updated in awhile a lot has happened since my last update. I was laid off from work on November 19. Then started working at School Bus Inc. as an aid the next day which was a God sent. I am still there and making it work the best I can. I am still looking for a better job but, haven't found anything yet. We had a good thanksgiving with Grandma and Granpa much fun was had by all. It is always hard to see them go I miss them as soon as they leave.

Then my Birthday yeah I am another year older now man where did the time go. I had a good birthday my friend Liz took me to the movies to see Twilight which I am so into. I have read all the books and now Liz is all into the books too.

Christmas was good to had Christmas at Mindy's with the kids. Mom and Dad rented a room at one of the hotels that has a indoor water park. I helped them watch the kids they had a blast it was so cool they love the water and Sam must have went down the slide a million times. They didn't want to leave but, all things come to an end.

New Years not much happened I went out with Liz and Jermey to the Castaway Bar which was so fun it is in a hotel that has a water park inside so their were kids everywhere having ablast it was fun gonna have to get a room there next year and do that again. That pretty much brings us up to date not much is happening. I know pretty boring isn't it catch you later.