Things have been changing...

Since my last post I went to Aunt Alice's for Thanksgiving while we where there we got to visit with some of dad's family. My Aunt Angie and Uncle Jeff were there visiting their son and all their kids were there. Was nice to see them we haven't gotten to see them the last few times we have been to Grandma's.

Then Christmas came we stayed here in Da Plains for Christmas I went to a friends house had fun with her kids. There was lots of food, games,and fellowship I so enjoy just having a good time with great people.

Anyway then there was New Year's my singles group from church went to a hockey game then all came over to our house for fellowship, food, and games. We had a lot of fun that night something we should do again for sure.

Grandma Martin passed away in early January so we headed to Illinois to say good bye to Grandma. Had a good visit with both sides of family I got to meet mom's brother's whom I had never met.

In February I moved into my own apartment it is a one bedroom. Has a nice size living room and bedroom. I love my little apartment so cute and cozy.

Then out of no where came J he has turned my world upside down. I have prayed for so long that the right guy would come along. I was beginning to think God forgot about me but, he hadn't we just weren't ready to met. Now I see why I had to wait God was preparing me for what was to come. I didn't know that I would need to be prepared but I did. We have both had our hearts pulled out and stomped all over. When you are with someone who has had the same thing happen to them as you it makes things easier to understand where they are coming from.

God was growing me into the strong Christian that he knew I needed to be for J and J has been growing for me. We weren't there until now not to say this last few months have been smooth sailing but, it could have been worse I guess.

We are so happy together he is just what I always wanted in my partner I just hadn't found him. J is so sweet, understanding, loving, caring, respectful, God fearing, funny, serious, hard working, servant, and responsible. There are things about J that I didn't think to ask God for I'm so glad that he gave them to him tho.

I am so happy right now in this season of my life. I hope that people can be happy for me and not dwell on the past. If there is something about J that I'm not seeing then I want it pointed out but, other wise can we not pull him apart please. Your not the one who is in the relationship I am maybe I wouldn't have chose the one you did for you. Needed to rant.

I say that to say this if you can't be happy for me and support me (cause i am an adult and I know the mistakes I have made in the past it happened to ME!!!!!) then don't say anything and you wont have to be in our lives. I say and mean this even IF things don't work out with J remember this for the future.

We have and do pray about our relationship and feel very strong about us and where we stand. there will not be a quick wedding if that is what your thinking relax. Did that once look how that turned out lol.

I think that is all have to get ready for work and J is coming over later might go for a walk later it is so beautiful outside.

Love ya'll

I have been deciding weather to post this here goes. I wrote this one day last week.



I went for a walk at my new favorite place the airport path. I love watching the F-16's take off and land. They fly really close to your head there and that is just to cool. I am so happy that I live in a country where planes flying over your head isn't a scary thing.



It was a beautiful day so I decided I would go down to the falls and sit. Which was over flowing due to all the rain we have had lately. I am so excited about what God has planned for my life. He has big plans I know that I just wish I knew what they where. I was thinking back wondering if this is why he has had me be content in the things that have happened over the last 2 years. Things I could do that I couldn't have done if I hadn't been laid off. I think about what I was asked the other night. What are your goals for the next 5-10 years? WOW I realized I didn't have any goal. Cause the only goal I ever had didn't happen or hasn't happened. The only goal I had was to get married and have children. I realized now that I have other goals they are just small goals like I want to go to a nascar race, go on a missions trip, and travel more.

I really feel like I am blooming where God planted me. He put me here for a reason and I see some of the things God wants me to do. I am so excited about starting the singles group this is something I have wanted for several years. We have so many things planned for our group that we want to do God is really going to use us.

So we all have those really lonely days were you feel like there is no one there. You want to do something but, no one to go do it with. That is when I think NO I am not alone I have God I am never alone. He will never leave me nor forsake me. When every other man treats me bad or does me wrong God is there.

I have faith that God will give me the desires of my heart. One day I will finally have my husband and family.

You don't even see me....

My cousin pointed out something to me a while back that I had felt but never said to anyone.

In our family if you are not married and have kids you aren't thought of as an adult. She is so right but, i will take it one step farther they don't even see you.

They come to visit and I love seeing them but, they come for the grand kids not to see me.

Feel like it doesn't matter what I do I wont make you proud till I am married and have a bunch of kids. I know I am not some great person but, it would be nice if you at least heard me when I spoke. Believed in me that I could do great things if I wanted.

I have tried to let people in and know me but, it like you don't want to know me.



The thing I love most about this blog is that since I have no kids or husband I have no pictures of them or updates. So in return no one reads this so it makes it easier for me to say what I want to say without holding back.

So second pity party is over for the day I think.....

Fairy Tales Aren't Real

So maybe I am having a pity party but, this is how I feel so take it or leave it.


I am so sick of people telling me I am young and have plenty of time. Cause I'm not the older I get the more I get annoyed by other people's kids and think how I don't want kids now. I think IF I had a kid now I would be 60 when the kid is 20 yeah I don't want that.



When we are young we are told all these fair tales how the princess gets the prince but, that isn't real life so why do we teach this to the kids??? It isn't fair.. Just like playing with Barbie not every woman is thin so why do we let our kids play with them???

I hate feeling envious of a younger girl that is married, engaged, or pregnant. I hate wishing that was me and knowing that it isn't. Maybe I had my chance and that is all I will have again..

I hate that I wanted to start over in a new place yet since I got there I haven't felt like it is any better then where I was.

I hate that I am willing to come to terms that I will never have a child call me mom or a man call me his wife. Even though it breaks my heart to think about it.

I am tried of believing in so fairy tale story or all the exceptions to the rule.

I hate hearing if so and so found someone there is still hope for you don't give up.. WOW thanks that made me feel so much beter.

I hate when people think they understand what you are going through yet they have always been with the one they are married to. You have no idea what it is like so stop pretending like you do.

I hate that what I have to do is suck it up and get over it cause there is nothing else I can do.

When do I get the desire's of MY heart??? I have asked when do I recieve them??? I guess I don't so I am done..

That is my rant take it or leave it but, this is my blog where I can say what I want this is my rant page..

Changes

I never know how to start my blogs out... So here we go.

Today I went to the lake with this AWESOME couple from church and his brother much fun was had by all. I got to thinking when I got home how much I LOVE hanging with them. I learn something new every time they are so honest and true. You know like you don't feel like they are fake like I have said before I have seen so many fake christians. I always said that I never wanted to be one but, you know what I was really I was a fake person completely. I was one way around my parents, church, and family then went to work, or hang out with my non- christian friends and be completely different.

Now that I have become more faithful in my prayer life and just faithful to God and all he is doing I feel like I am finding ME.. I think I could have told you about me before but, now I am discovering this whole new person that I want to be. I almost feel like a baby christian I craving being around other christians.

There is this super sweet couple in the church they are so fun, she is loud and boisterous he is tall and funny. They are just cute together then you throw in his brother who is just hilarious and so honest about everything. They really have made me open my eyes to a new way of thinking and I am loving it. I was already shouting for God the last 5 months but, the last 3 weeks it has been even more. It amazes me how a conversation with someone can open your eyes so much more.

I look back at where I was going now I was leading my life even 9 months ago and think WOW why was I doing that? How was I never here in the spot that I am now? Why did I never feel like I wanted to shout for Jesus before? Now I want to stand on the roof and tell everyone I see... I am not complaining at all I am so happy with where I am right now and I can't wait to see where it is going to go.

In Love....

I got inspired by a couple other blogs who posted pics of shoes they love so here are some of my favorites. I love these Black patton Ariat's since the first time I saw them a year ago I so want them..

Then there are these BEAUTIES LOVE the red boots so cute...

These are just cute have to have them...

Then there are the heels.... I wasn't a big heels person till recently. I got a couple pairs and not I am addicted to heels.

These I like the look of them but not crazy about the print..

These I want cause they are RED I so want a pair of red shoes....

These are really cute also like them a lot...

Does anybody hear her??

I have always loved the song Does Anybody Hear Her by Casting Crowns for many reasons. So much of that song was me. Not so much any more tho..

I love the line ' she is yearning for shelter and affection that she never got at home she is searching for a hero to ride in to ride in and save the day. And in walks her prince charming and he knows just what to say momentary lapse of reason and she gives herself away.'

I have thought about that line many times and I think I finally know why I fell in love with it. So I think part of it is the searching for affection. I am like an affection junky I love that cuddling you know just that touch and holding someone. Showing someone that you care for them.

I think that is why I dated so many loser's cause I was searching for someone just to show me that attention that I needed and wanted. I am dealing with it different now then I did before.

This is what I hate about having a job that doesn't work my brain I have to much time to think. I used to tell myself I didn't want to be a "fake" christian so instead I ran away completely to keep from being a "fake" christian. I have been a more out ward christian in the last few months and he feels great mind, body, and soul. Why did I run from this is what I been thinking all day...

I have made many changes in the last few months and that has help also have surrounded myself with christian people. This summer has been a blessing and a curse I have a wonderful christian woman that is helpful in encouraging me and I encourage her. But it hasn't been all roses we are working with a lady that is unsaved and has many issues. She is very standoffish and doesn't like us listening to christian music and has complained about that. She is trying very hard to stir things up tell lies about me and try to get me in trouble.

It really bothers me tho cause I have gotten so much closer then I have ever been before. I never would have been so out word with my believes before. If someone had a problem with what I was listening to I would change it for them and I am not giving in. I think I am the opposite really I play the music more and don't care what she says. So every day I pray for help to make it through the day and dealing with her.

I know I covered a lot in this post but, I had a lot on my mind and didn't want to do two post.

If we ask and have faith we will recieve

Ok so all our lives we are taught that if we pray and ask God for something we will recieve. I have become more faithful in praying for what I want and I have faith that God will give me what I ask for.

I can't let others change that I was a little excited about something the other day and someone stomped on my excitement. I know that there are people who have no idea what it is like to want something pray for it and sit and let God bring it to you. So much has changed for me in the last 5 months with God's help I have changed my life. The fact that others noticed this that I don't talk to that much means God and I are on the right track here.

I learned that what I thought was stricked as a child was no where near stricked. I am very thankful for all that my parents did for us but, I know there are many reasons why I did the things that I did for the last 10 years I see them now. Some would probly say that it isn't why but, only God and I know the reasons.

I am so happy that God has put me where I am today I know that is for a reason also. I am also excited for where God is leading my life I enjoy talking to people at church, doing activies with them, and having a christian to talk to.

So I am so excited to see where God lead me in the future.....

The Right One...

So I was sitting here thinking and that can be really dangerous but, once upon a time I made a list. So here is what I am thinking for a good man...

Loves God
Smart
Cute
Tall
Sense of humor
Can make me laugh
Funny
Spontaneous
Hard worker
Enjoys fishing
Enjoys the out doors
Family oriented
Wants kids
Has passion
Affectionate
He is a MAN!!! (and acts like one)
Has his own things that he is into
Is there for you when you need him
Honest
Trustworthy
Faithful
Loves me for me
Easy to talk to
MY BEST FRIEND

That person that I can sit and have a conversation about nothing, for hours. This is the person I am going to spend the rest of my life with.

To have those dumb conversation that I have with my other friends and he gets it.. You know he really gets me and I get him..

We have things that we do together yet we also have out separate things..

To know that in 20 years when it is us we will still be able to have a conversation about nothing..

Can sit around and joke on and with each other...

Be goofy at times and silly....

Enjoy life have fun cause you never know what will happen.....

Today

So maybe it is because I don't have a tv in front of my bed now that I am in the basement but, been listening to the music on my itunes on the computer.

I have decided NeedToBreathe is now my new favorite band need to download more of their music. Anyway it has gotten me thinking also with what I have been going through the last couple of months. On January 15 I put my last cigarette out for good I haven't picked one up since and don't plan on it either. I am very proud of myself this is something I struggled with for many years.

In the months since quiting I have drawn closer to the Lord and my family. I don't feel like this strange,stinky, black sheep any more. It amazing what can happen with PRAYER, will power, and mints.

There have been many changes in me the last few months it is not something I can put fully into words but, I am really happy where I am spiritually, mentally, and physically. That is the best way I can describe it to you.

Like I love this song 'What This World Needs' there is a part where they talk about we really just need to get out of God's way.

'People aren't confused by the Gospel they are confused by us, Jesus is the only way to God but, we are not the only way to Jesus. This world doesn't need my tie, My hoodie, my denomination, or my translation on the Bible. they just need Jesus we can be passionate about what we believe but, we can't strap ourselves to the gospel cause we're slowing it down. Jesus is going to save the world but, maybe the best thing we can do is JUST GET OUT OF THE WAY.

There are soooo many songs that I am loving right now here are a few.....
Something Beautiful - NeedToBreathe
More Time - NeedToBreathe
Love is here- tenth Avenue North
All Along - Remedy Drive
Washed By the Water - NeedtoBreathe
Until the whole world hears - Casting Crowns
Forgiven and Loved - Jimmy Needham
Forgiven- Sanctus Real
On and On - Chasen
What This World Needs - Casting Crowns

If you haven't heard even one of these google it and listen to the words you will like it also trust me they are all good songs.

I love listening to these songs they lift me and Christ up I am praising him and I feel better through out the day by listening to them....

Revival

Ok so this is late but, I just was sitting here playing games on Facebook and thought I need to update and I made notes one day on my phone I need to post that. So here it is first I will tell you we had revival in March the 21-24 with Sam Davidson. The lord really blessed my heart and I will share the notes i put in my phone one day when I was riding on the bus.

So we had revival this week at church great services loved the preaching that Bro Sam brought to us. I was blessed by so much of what he said during the last three days. I will share with you what god blessed and revealed to me. There are many things that happen in our lives and we ask 'God why did you let this happen to me?' I know he allows us to go through things because we can handle it and we learn. There are many things that have happened in my life that I could have went without having to learn from. I don't think I would be who I am today if I hadn't went through those things.

Some times we want to put a limit on God like ok God it is in your hands till____then when we get to that point we say ok I guess I will have to help you Lord. God doesn't need my help I have to stop limiting him on what he can do. He has a plan for me I just need to get out of his way and let him do his work. I know his plan is way better then whatever I have.

So I am stepping out of the way and letting God have his way in my life everyday. It is amazing to me how you change a few things in your life and you really feel the difference in your life.

Things I am learning now.....

I find it so funny now how things come around.... ok everyone else probably already had this figured out about me but I didn't.

So I have the bad habit of finding the wrong guys I end up dating these guys that are wrong for me. So recently I started talking to this guy and I wasn't really into do to some things but, I always try to give people a chance. After a few days of thinking and talking to the person I decided that I couldn't date him but we could be friends.

Any way that isn't the point the point is I need to stop seeing people just because they are into me that is not a reason to date someone. I need to be into them also which starts that way then i look more at the person and realize there is no way this could ever work.

How is it that I never understood this before??? I knew I had a act for finding losers but, now I know why I let them hang around.

On another note check out these pics I found thanks to thepioneerwoman.com.

How cool are these this guy draws different things one of them is Phat Chicks. I loved these 3 pics thought it was really cool that he draws phat chicks he does others also. That is all have a great day later yo.....

Lots to say......

I have lots of thoughts going through my little brain tonight it happens all the time tho. I wander things like where is my prince that I was promised in the fairy tales???

Why do I obsess about said prince knowing that they only exist in fairy tales??? Yeah I know there are a few princes out there but, they belong to someone else. Seriously how can one person obsess over something so much it is always in my mind. No one understands the way it is people say 'oh you are still young you have time' yeah yeah. That is not the point why can't I have the fairy tale I always wanted????

When I was a kid the only thing I ever wanted when I grew up was to get married and have kids. Sounds so easy yet not at all. Even harder when everyone you know has kids and a man I am surrounded by them.

I know having a man and kids doesn't bring happiness I am not saying that at all I am very happy with my life I just want my fairy tale also is that so much to ask???

Then are always the wonderful people who ask you are you married? Do you have any kids??? Or this is the other one that I get are you the one that is married??? Seriously so that is how I am known as the non married daughter nice thanks!!! Like I'm not depressed enough I need to be asked all these lovely questions.

Ok I think I am done complaining that is my rant for the week..

You never know where I will be.....

So I am back in the Arctic South Dakota things did not work out in Indiana. Even tho lots of people wanted them too. Country man and I did not work out big surprise there right impossible to find a good guy.

So back living with the folks which I forgot how funny they are oh my goosh they crack me up. Working at School Bus which pays saving money to buy a car with my tax check. Working out trying to lose some weight and changing my life in different ways. I had a bad habit which some of you know about and I tried quiting back in March. Well Monday it will be a month that I have quit. I am so proud of myself and plan to keep it this way. I feel great even better after i workout it is amazing how great you feel after.

The other day the folks and i were talking and I told them I am so over finding a man I am not even going there any more. If they want me out of the house they have to find me a husband they laughed at me. I don't think they will really do it tho cause they think everyone is 'weird'. Which in it self is really funny cause they are weird they just don't know they are.

So I guess we will wait and see what happens you never know. So I think that is about all for this post may add something later.

Love ya

I Should have called and told you.....

I am swooning.... Awwww... ok but, seriously. I have meet me a man and things are going well. I have been afraid to say anything for the many questions there will be. But I really like Country man and things are very different with him then with any other guy. I think that is why I decided to write this out I need to work things out in my head.

So I guess the starter is where did I meet him? Well I went to meet Country Man's friend. I didn't know he was bringing Country Man I am so glad he did tho. Me and the friend did not hit it off but, I did with Country Man. Needless to say said friend was not happy and didn't want us talking and I said if CM agrees then fine. CM did not agree and called me the next day there have been MANY long nights on the phone for the last 2 weeks. We finally got to see each other again on Friday night and went out Saturday for my birthday.

We went to dinner at LOGAN'S of course then went bowing with Steph,Kenny, Kevin, Melissa, and Scott. We all had so much fun one of my best birthday's I had my girls with me and Country Man. It was wonderful!!! SWOON

So now to the part that I need to work out in my head. I think I have it figured out but, still thinking on it. So Country Man and I are taking things so not RUSHING. I know what a switch for me but, really I'm not I am going one day at a time with this. Things are going great Country Man has spoke of things like what do you want for Christmas and we have talked of doing a few things in the next couple of months.

So why does this feel so different then with any guy I have ever been with? That is the part I can't get. He's not like other guys I have dated before either he is sweet and tender and says the nicest things. To which I joke and say ' keep earning those brownie points' which he is. I have never had some one call me Miss America, perfect, gorgeous, and just beautiful. This is not normal for me I love it but, so not used to it. He cares about how I feel about different things he is so gentle, respectful, honest, gentleman, and Country. I shocked him one day he asked me if I knew who Bill Dance was? I said yeah I know who he is My dad watches his fishing show. Not even kidding this is what he says "Me and your dad will get along great we can watch hunting and fishing all day." Great me and mom will shop!!! I know I not looking for a man for my dad but, I enjoy those things I loved it when dad came home with whatever he went hunting for. Those are great memories I have with my dad.

Fuzzy says that I think it feels different because I'm not rushing things that I am going one day at a time and seeing what happens. I am excited and can't wait to see where things go but, I'm not pushing things to get there. So I guess what I am saying is I am happy so happy I can't even explain fully what I am feeling cause I don't know. What I do know is I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings.

I LOVE Songs

You ever have a song that just I don't know how to say it sticks with you and it won't go away? Sure you have everyone has.

After reading someone else's blog I now have a song stuck in my head. Like said person I love this song it says so much about having the Faith that we some times forget we have. The things God has done in our lives or people that we know.

I love music and think that songs speak a message to us in their own way. There is another song that we sang at Falls Church Called Second Chance by Hillsong I love this song.

You called my name Reached out Your hand

Restored my life And I was redeemed

The moment You entered my life

Amazing grace Christ gave that day My life was changed

When from my shoulders Fell the weight of my sin

So it’s with everything I am I reach out for Your hand

The hope for change The second chance I’ve gained

On You I throw my life Casting all my fears aside How could greater love than this

Ever possibly exist

Consume my thoughts As I rest in You

I’m now in love With a Saviour Bearing the marks of His love

So I’ll wait upon You now With my hands released to You

Where a little faith’s enough To see mountains lift and move

And I’ll wait upon You now Dedicated to Your will

To this love that will remain A love that never fails


It is such a true song His love never fails, No one loves us like God loves us and he can move mountains. When everything feels like you are in the pit and never going to get out he is there with his hand stretched out to us. To pull us out of the pit believe me cause I have been in that pit several times.

No mater what we do he still loves us and is there for us. I know I can always turn to God for help whenever I need it and he will be there I take comfort in that.

I want to share a few songs that I have been listening to I will give you titles you can look them up I have several. Go check them out you might like them.

What Faith Can Do by Kutless
All Along By Remedy Drive
Lord move, or move me By FFH
Every move I make by Hillsong kids
The words i would say by Sidewalk prophets
More Beautiful You by Jonny Diaz
Love is here By Tenth Avenue North
By Your side By Tenth Avenue North
Can't get away by Rush Of Fools
There's only Grace Matthew West

So go check them out they might speak to you also.

Have a great day love Toni :)

Home Is Where The Heart Is.............

I love being Home


I just have to blog about this because I have been thinking about it the last couple of days and it the only way I will get it out of my head.

So you know how when you go away on vacation or visit someone then when you come home you are so relieved and happy. That is how I have felt for the last few weeks being back in Indiana. It’s so like coming home from a long vacation I know that sounds weird to anyone else. This is home for me; my heart has been here since I left 2 years ago. I was happy in Sioux Falls with my family I am always happy to be with them and I miss them lots. But I love being back in Indiana. Melissa used to tell me ‘you just don’t seem happy there you need to come home where you were happy’. I thought she was just trying to get me back here which she was but, I wasn’t as happy as I am here. Looking back on all I have done the last 2 years I wasn’t happy I see that now I didn’t then.


I am so excited to start this new chapter in my life it’s not a new beginning it is almost picking up where I left off. Working at TG, seeing (and living with) Melissa, all my friends, and seeing JJ. You don’t realize how much you miss things till they aren’t there or they come back. I knew I missed everyone but, I didn’t realize I missed them this much. It is the little things that I missed the most driving down a country road, all the fall trees, creek walking, walks in the woods, 4 wheeling, and bond fires in the woods. Things we used to do and can do again I love that so much. I love when Melissa looks at me and says remember when we used to do this lets go do this. We did a lot of crazy things (sorry dad) but, we where always careful and we had fun. I guess I missed being a country girl the most, getting dirty and having fun while doing it.

So the question is to me would you change the last 2 years? No I got to experience a lot of things that I never probably would have if I hadn’t moved. I meet some great people that I will never forget and will always love. I got to spend time with my family I love being with my niece and nephews I miss them so much.

The other question I get why did you move back? I missed this place everyone who lives here wants to get out. I have been out I wouldn’t trade southern Indiana for any where in the world I love it here. Maybe it is the people I have around me that make it extra special but, I real do love this area.

I know I jump around in what I am saying sometimes it is because there is so much going on in my head. I get off on one thing then go back to something else I guess I am a little scatter brain.

Until next time have a great day and I will post new pictures soon.

Yeah I know what you are thinking......

I know where have you been? What are you doing? What is going on? So here is the deal remember how in my last post I was going to Indiana for 3 weeks on vacation.

Well.....I am staying in Indiana!!!!! I know what heck. Total shocker to me also I wasn't planning on staying no one was. I went by my old job on Thursday the 22 to see my friend we talked and thought we would play a joke on my old boss. The job I had when I was here opened up bout a month ago I knew it was open Fuzzy had already tried to get me to take it. So Connie and i thought it would be funny to fill out the bid form for the job and put it on his desk so we did. I wasn't expecting him to really do anything about it. Connie text me and said he was looking into bringing me back then the HR lady calls me says they want me to go to Kelly and fill out the app. Because they aren't hiring right now they have to go through Kelly. I tell her I need to think about it and talk it over with some people and I would get back to her(my parents and Melissa). So I talk to Melissa she is cool with it then I make the phone call to dad DOOM DOOM DOOM. He was more worried about the plane ticket then anything I couldn't believe it. He isn't excited because it is so far away from them but, he knows that there aren't jobs there for me.

So I called my old boss back told him i could start on Nov 2 (I am on vacation remember) because I am going to Indy the last week on October. I go down to Kelly Friday morning fill everything out the lady says they want you to start on the 26. I said no I told them I can't I am going to Indy for the week. Then I said ok I will start on the 26th IF I can have Friday off that is the only way they said ok. So I started back at my old job yesterday. Can you believe that WOW I am still in shock.

Last night went really well there are things that will come back over time I know mostly it is learning the numbers of things again. Otherwise all is well I am happy Melissa is happy we got my room all set up well cleaned up more she already had it set up. I will be so happy after this weekend I wont have to live out of a suitcase anymore. After I get a couple pay checks going to send dad money to send me more clothes and shoes. It really sucks when you know you have something some where and you can't get it so annoying I hate that.

So that is what is new and exciting in my life i tell you, you never know what will happen or where I might be.


On a totally different matter I just want to say when you were a kid and your parents made you clean the house and you said they only had you to clean their house ( that is what I said). We used to tease my dad and say your dirty is everyone else's clean. Then you grow up and have a place of your own and you keep it clean you fell proud of that and don't realize that is what they were going for teaching you to do those things. I am very thankful for all the things my parents taught me as a child I didn't know it then but I do now that they were all very important things for me to learn.

Thanks Mom and Dad for being great christian role modles, taking us to church every week, and teaching us things about life that we didn't understand at the time. I know I have made my own mistakes but, you have always been right there praying for me and the Lord's will in my life. Thank you for being the best parents I love you guys.

So here is what is up...

So I back here in Souix Falls, SD been here since July. Things are going ok I started back at School Bus filling in as a aid. It is going ok hey it is a paycheck if nothing else. I am really excitied that I get to take a 3 week vaction in 16 days. Two of my girls are getting married yeah for them. So Fuzzy and John are getting married on Oct. 12 and Jada and Brian are on Oct. 31. I am so happy for my girls. Really excited that I get to see some people like my other girl Melissa, Stephanie, Kevin and so many others.

Melissa is really excited also she can't wait for me to get there. I miss you girl

This is my Jada she is getting married on Oct 31. I can't believe my Jada is getting married. We have know and been friends since we were 8 years old that is way to long. I can't even believe that it has been that long.

This is Melissa and John they are getting married on October 12. I am so happy for them I have watched this relationship blossom since day one. I saw it before they did I love doing that. I thought John was never going to ask her (neither did Melissa). I am so happy for you guys Love you lots.

Things are changing!!!!

So a lot of things have happened in my life the last couple of week. I'm not going to tell all but, lets just say I have hit an all time low now. I did it I have no one to blame but, me it is ok I know I will come out of this.

So on Sunday my sister is taking me back to Sioux Falls. Yes I know what a surprise but, this will be good it is better then staying in Texas. I wont be a burden to my sister and her family. So it is back to living with the folks. Not that excited about that but, yet I am. Have to start a job search which I hate. But I have to find a job I have to go to Indiana in October for 2 weddings need to make some money.

Yes 2 of my favorite people are getting married. One is my best friend since the 3rd grade. My Jada is getting married on the 31st yes Halloween. I know surprise right. The other is Melissa(aka Fuzzy) I worked with her in Indiana she is marry a guy we both worked with. He is a great guy I am so happy for them.

I'm not sure if I want to put this out there on here but, I don't think anyone reads this anyway. Let me start at the beginning since I moved to SF EVERYONE in Indiana has wanted me to come back and live there. I have to say that it has crossed my mind a couple of times to move back. So the other day I was presented with a really great offer to move there. I'm not going to go into detail just yet I am still thinking and praying about where God wants me to be. There are lots of job opportunities there for me more then in SF. I really think I want to do this my only concern is telling my folks I don't think they will like the idea of this happening. I think they will say it is crazy that it wont work and I am going to fall on my face. To that I say I did good in Indiana had jobs that were good and I made sure my bills were paid. I never had problems like this there. I also have a great support system there I have lots of 'Family' there they all love me and want to help me out.

So this is what is going on in my life so exciting huh. Please pray for me in this time that I am going through.